The world is panicking about the novel coronavirus pandemic but what nobody talks about is the importance of mental health during situations like this. I am going to talk about this mental crisis because most people don’t think it is important enough to address. Trust me. It is equally as important. As of now, the best solution we have is to stay indoors but most of us don’t really comprehend how hard that is if surrounded by the wrong people. Staying indoors for days and losing sanity by the end of the pandemic absolutely makes no sense. If you lose yourself mentally, then is there a purpose to fight to stay physically alive?
There is this maxim that says, ” People think being alone makes you lonely but I don’t think that is true being surrounded by the wrong people is the loneliest thing in the world.” -Kim Culbertson
I felt the need to address this issue as the myth produced by sexist memes and comics where the cliched constant ‘nagging’ wife forces her ‘poor victimized’ husband to run outdoors. I think it is time to stop that as honestly, nobody knows how hard it is for a woman with the potential to change the world to wait hand and foot on most Indian men who aren’t even capable of cleaning up their own messes, literally and figuratively. I have been reading a few articles about the rise of domestic abuse during this time and frankly, there is anything domestic about it! There is also a prediction of a huge increase in divorce rates by the time lockdown is over! Well, that seems inevitable.
Well, I understand and I have been there. It is not easy being forced to stay for days with no relief. And if you do get out of it by some luck, you still face years of PTSD and it’s not ok. Toxic relationships, narcissistic households and family politics might just get too much to handle when you don’t have your job or financial independence to fall back on.
I can only imagine the mental state of people who have been living like this for years with no option to leave from the situation of mental torture.
It is not easy to live with constant criticism, constant nagging, constant restrictions of not even been allowed to go to the balcony of your house by the very people who are supposed to protect and support you the most.
It is not easy to live when you are made to feel insignificant constantly so that you stay “in your place”.
It is not easy to live when you are treated with no respect and is abused; emotionally, verbally, mentally or physically so that you feel useless constantly.
It is not easy to live around constant manipulation and deception and drama and where you have to constantly think on your feet, lest u shall be lied to and fooled again.
It is not easy and believe me, this is just the tip of the Iceberg. Before dismissing it after reading, I need you to take a moment and look at your partner or other members of your family and try to understand how they feel in this situation. And if they are in this situation, then I urge you to be the #warrior for them.
Now for those people who live like this, when you feel like a caged animal with nowhere to go, I need you to know that this situation is temporary. You will slowly feel like you are losing yourself bit by bit but I need you to understand that you have a lot of people who care for you. You are just stuck at the wrong end, so hang in there till help arrives. Don’t take mental health in such situations lightly. I know it’s not easy but reach out for help. But please do. Talk to a therapist or motivated friends and if nobody is available during this time, then try meditation or exercise. Or just lock yours
yourself up in your room and give 10 minutes to your mental peace everyday by doing nothing, by cutting away from all toxicity and reviving yourself. Or if you can, then dance or sing. Even if you make yourself look like a fool, it’s ok. Your body needs your sanity and so does your family. Take care of yourself first.
In fact, the truth about life from my experience is that when you go through immense pain ,you are broken into pieces time and again, but don’t worry. Let yourself be shattered so that when you put the pieces back together you get something greater and stronger than you ever imagined. You get the chance to rebuild yourself the way you want! So make it count.
The author is Dr Zaeba S Gani,
Celebrity Dentist, Former model